Sejarah Chapter 1.1 Zaman-Zaman

Zaman Paleolitik& Mesolitik (Also known as Zaman Poopy and Muppy)

NOMADS. (They are NOT MAD!!! That's why they move around like sensible people. At least, according to them.)

Not yet stayed permanantly, and does activities such as memburu binatang, memungut hasil hutan and menangkap ikan. (Which does not require them to stay in a place permanantly)

Zaman Neolitik (Also Known as Zaman Cikgu Neoh)

Starts to (menetap dalam kelompok yang BESAR.)

Poopy and Muppy only in small groups, but Neoh (Imagine hundreds of Cikgu Neoh) are in one, big, happy family. (One big happy disciplinary family).

Neoh is very smart and clever. They start to smoothen their skin sorry, I mean their alatan batu, and also starts to make beautiful decorations useful ceramic (Bahan tembikar) otherwise known as watermelon (tembikai) err, stuff.

Kehidupan menetap dan keupayaan menghasilkan bahan makanan melebihi keperluan telah melahirkan sistem pertukaran barang yang dikenali sebagai sistem barter

(Sistem Butter: Once upon a time, A cute little Neoh had too much butter, because she is a butter maker, and so she sold her butter to a butterless Neoh, who was a fish maker, and got some smelly fishies in return.)

Zaman Logam (Also Known as Logan, aka Wolverine from X-Men)

Logan has two children, Gangsa (Boy Wonder-Gangster) and Besi (Bessie the Cow).

These two children are very good superchildren, especially the Cow (besi), and 'menyebabkan manusia pada zaman ini (aka Little Logans) berjaya mereka cipta perahu dan rumah (To battle eviel!!)

'Dengan perahu, manusia dapat meneroka lautan dan meningkatkan kegiatan perdagangan maritim' (Konon. Just say 'battle EVIEL' lah...)

During that 'zaman', 'di sesetengah kawasan telah muncul petempatan besar dan kota pertahanan. (SEE!! Kota pertahanan, means that there WAS war between guud and EVIEL! Well, okay, no evidence in history, but still!!)

Petempatan besar ini kemudiannya telah berkembang menjadi bandar atau kota. (Kota Kinabalu, we larb you!!)

Contoh dua buah bandar purba: Jericho di Jordan (8000s.m) dan Catal Huyuk di Turki (6500s.m)

Other facts:

Artifak: Barang yang dicipta manusia

Feature: Struktur bangunan atau tinggalan yang tidak dapat diubah atau dipindahkan

Ekofak: Tinggalan seperti sisa makanan, tumbuh-tumbuhan dan tulang (Boleh reput)

Selain sistem butter Barter, pertukaran barang dagangan juga melibatkan cangkerang siput gerus (COWRIE- they named this after Bessie the Cow the superkid) sebagai nilai tukaran dagangan. (At least Cowries are prettier than the new RM50 note... Urgh.)

Di Tanah Besar Asia Tenggara, Zaman Logan Logam muncul pada sekitar tahun 1000-1500 S.M.. Ini terbukti dengan penemuan artifak gendang gangsa yang dihasilkan di Dongson (East Sun??), Vietnam Utara.

Logans (People in Zaman Logam) telah mengetahui cara mengebumikan mayat dengan iringan bekal kubur seperti tembikar, makanan, alatan besi dan sebagainya. (Give me marshmellows!!)

Conclusion: The development of human beings from Poopy and Muppy until Logan, and then finally, TAMADUN!!!